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“I’m gonna smile my best smile and I’m gonna laugh like it’s going out of style.”

Many of you who follow me on twitter or are facebook friends with me see me use this quote over and over again.

It is lyrics from Garth Brook’s Learning to Live Again.

I loved this song from the first time I heard it, however it was a song that got me though some of my more difficult times in life.

I’d be lying if I ever said I always had such a positive outlook on life.  My obstacles & challenges in life have made me a stronger individual.  That being said, I didn’t always react so positively and constructively when faced with them.

I realized during my early college years that I could make every situation better by seeing the light in the dark.  This song is how I remind myself of that.

I was already debating this as a tattoo when I lost one of my closest guy friends to suicide.

I was devastated that I never had the chance to tell him how much he meant to me.  While we hadn’t been close friends for long and most didn’t even realize how close we were since most of it was via technology due to going to college 6 hours from each other; I considered him one of my best friends at the time.  It was completely unexpected and I was in utter shock initially.

However, I knew that fretting about what I didn’t say couldn’t change what had happened. It took me about a week to fully come to terms with the reality of the situation and realize that all I could do was remember the happy times.  Being angry or asking impossible questions doesn’t make the grief any easier to handle.  I still miss him. I still have sad moments.  But I can’t let that run my life.   Instead I chose to take this phrase that already meant a lot to me and make it my motto for life.

It will soon be a part of me forever.  I have had some people question why get something so lengthy as a tattoo especially if you already live it, but I feel like it will help me remember during the trying times in life whatever they may be.  No matter how hard something might seem to be you always have to make the best of it.  If you find a way to smile and laugh at the worst times, God will give you a reason to continue to smile and laugh.

It will also be my reminder of what I have accomplished, how I got to where I am, and all the people that have helped to make me who I am. Some of these people may no longer be living or may no longer be a part of my life, but if they were a part of my life they impacted me in one way or another and helped shape who I am today.

Thank you to all those who have made me into the person I am.  I may not have appreciated every lesson or challenge at the time, but because of overcoming them I can say I am honestly proud of who I am today.  Thank you to those that I haven’t met yet who may shape me in one way or another in the days, weeks, months, and years to come.

I’m just me. I’m just Megan.

I’m just learning to live day by day. Smiling my best smile and laughing like it’s going out of style.